My voice faded away before I had to hang up the phone... I needed to sigh in order to regain after it a bit of air in order to say goodbye... And it hurted. It hurted not as hell but maybe as shit.
I had never, EVER before let a tear fall because of something like this. Obviously five or six of those full of dark- mist droplets are out of question.
And I know; I knew, that it could happen just the way it happened. Even now I know I can handle it well (at least I guess I will be ok).
Is just that I thought that maybe lots of love, a sunflower and an egg-shaped chocolate called as "children" traduce to german, total naiveness (if it may be called like that) and a kiss would help her see that I could be the one to understand her crazy way of living; which I realize by this time I loved so much, and that nevermind what happened I´d be there.
I feel lame...
And it sucks. (Still now I get why people sometimes crash completely into the ground. Awful is when it happens because "It isn´t u but her..."
Maybe this is the hardest thing I´ve ever written in this place.
Maybe she just wasn´t my brand of heroine at all...
And the image maybe explains more what´s been happening since all this things started...
I´m not still Tin Woodman... since he had no heart at all...
Ayer en el transporte que llevaba a la escuela comenté a miss princess lips (con relación a que los miercoles no tengo clases en la uni): "Nada más vine para ver si me tocaba verte en el transporte..." Y luego vino la sonrisa pícara. Se rió, incrédula. Nos bajamos del transporte y le dije, llegando al campus sureño ( Tipo "Disturbing City" y no tipo "Gone with the wind") que ya me iba a la casa. Me despedí, di media vuelta y cuando estaba justo a punto de salir rumbo a casa decidí que podía parar mi farsa y regresé a la escuela. Cabe mencionar que la farsa recaía en volver a casa; no en el gusto que me daba verla.
Sin embargo ocurrió todo como debía pasar un día sin clases. El chico de muchas nacionalidades renunció al trabajo y había que ir a celebrar ahora que podíamos antes de que lo reempléen (¿se escribe así?) el viernes.
Así recorrimos el CNA y la FILIJ sin que estuviera lleno de niños, lo cual fue muy agradable. Pero luego vino lo bueno: La Condesa-el no encontrar lugar para estacionarse- el cambiar de decisión de a donde ir- el encontrar lugar- el ir a dar al TEAVANA.
Y esa visita, con todos sus aromas, su cheesecake, sus asientos agradables y el ambiente excelente, más la compañía y el gesto de la invitación hicieron completamente mi semana...
Y por último: I keep falli´n more & more everyday.
And, well. After my b-day the great (nasal) flood came. As we know already, flu for me comes in two kinds of moments:
1. When there is a math exam coming right away.
and
2. When I´m confused (basically on the so called "love affairs").
And just for the last tip: This semester I´ve got no math classes.
So, I stayed at home for four days, did an extreme makeover to my room (which I could barely recognize at first but now I´m getting used to it) and I also continued with my writings.
About the love thing I guess I got the answer at last. It is gonnna be risky, but I guess the risk is worth what I´ll do. I´ll tell u later what happens.
But by now, I´ve figured that even when I´ve got new projects and things to do and really DO feel different about everything in my life, it shouldn´t be that stressful or complicated as I wanted everything to be (not that I want it to be that way, just that I am learning how to make drama about everything.)
And at last, the things I had to tell u:
1. ¡Yo me quedé con los boletos! A pesar de que traté y traté que mi compañero de ejercicio me diera las razones para dárselos eso no pasó y como se quedó sin recursos verbales pasó a los físicos y cuando trató de arrebatarme la mochila con los boletos le dio un puntapié mi personaje en la espinilla, se echó a correr y gritó te odio de una forma desgarradora. Aspi fue el ejercicio de teatro al final.
2.Efectivamente, la letra (inciso) que me salté en el post inaugural del semestre tiene un nombre. Espero ya en próximas fechas poder poner cosas sobre eso. ( O sea, sí leo los comments que dejan, sólo prefiero contestarlos con acciones, o sea contarles qué pasó que en ela misma ventana de comentarios, je je).
3. Ayer vi a Fuentes y Nadine Gordimer y Gabo y demaseses. Qué agradable estuvo y qué cool está la sala Nezahualcoyotl (sí, nunca había ido, lo acepto). Hasta como para verte con gente que hace tiempo no ves en su cafetería. Sobre la conferencia, simplemente escuchar a quienes estuvieron hablar sobre el arte de narrar, crear, imaginar y soñar fue imperdible.
4. Leo Crepúsculo para debatirlo con mi prima. Hace aaaaaaños no me costaba tanto trabajo pasar de las primeras páginas de un libro que la verdad no me llama nada la atención. Pensé que yo no lo diría, pero ese tipo de literatura, para mi, está muy chafa con sus personajes antipáticos y gringuísimos. Sin embargo lo voy a acabar al rato.
5. Ya sé. ya sé que arriba puse algo... Sin embargo... I´ve just seen a face... Y ya saben de que trata lo demás después de que haga eso de la catársis de emociones.
6. Paté de fuá es la onda. Se presentan el domingo en la FILIJ a las 6.
That was all.
/Oquei /dats ol./joup tu si lla sún/ (inglés washawasheado para principiantes).
Happy 20 to me. There were wonderful gifts (mom: x box live, sis: Paris je t´aime, Fight Club, dad: money, Pepe: Shakespeare´s Complete works in a cool edition) cake(S) nd surprises. Thanks for the 42 comments on feisbú about happy b-day.
Esta imagen es cortesía de mi página de diseño favorita. Se nota como cierto favoritismo hacia Obama si nos fijamos en el cuidado entre una y otra... pero está interesante. Chequenla.
Y bueno. Esa Gabi tiene razón... Can´t wait to see back this posts in some years!
Wait. No. I can really wait a looong time;-)
For the ones in the US don´t follow the Mc Cain Starbucks campaign!! just follow your real interests, doesn´t matter who u follow.
Si en México aplicaran algo así en tacos de pastor o canasta... ¿Funcionaría?
Me parece interesante y curioso. Por eso está en el blog.
Acerca del examen de teatro: estuvo super pro. El mejor ejercicio, la gente rió, hubo catársis de personajes y un escucha increible. Character creation, here I come!
Ahora...¡A leer lo que yo quiera! ¡Se acabaron los exámenes!
Sí. Sé que no suelo postear de noche. Pero a escasos 9 días de cumplir los veinte debo poner esta canción en el blog. Sé que Lady Stardust la conoce. Mi ahora casado Kindred Spirit me la presentó en un momento en el que todos se casaban pero ella no estaba ni cerca ( y se preocupaba por ello... quien la viera ahora, je je.)
La canción la ví con Amelele la primera vez hace aproximadamente 5 años. Y sí, quizá sea el video más importante que haya subido al blog.
Buena onda los que lo han leído desde que esto era el lugar del Little Dragon (el primer intento de mantener un blog, del que no encuentro el link pero ya alguna vez lo puse en el pasado en esta página, justo cuando lo reencontre de suerte en la red) y aún más a los que están aqui ahora que hay que escribir la edad con un 2 al principio en vez de un 1.
And maybe now it´s time not to find but to create the answer to my own origin and the last goal...
Please enjoy it.
Y aquí está la letra gracias a que Annie hizo la observación, jejeje.
The Origin of Love
When the earth was still flat And clouds made of fire And mountains stretched up to the sky Sometimes higher Folks roamed the earth like big rolling kegs They had two sets of arms They had two sets of legs They had two faces peering Out of one giant head So they could watch all around them As they talked; while they read And they never knew nothing of love It was before the origin of love The origin of love
And there were three sexes then, One that looked like two men Glued up back to back Called the children of the sun And similiar in shape and girth Was the children of the earth They looked like two girls rolled up in one And the children of the moon Were like a fork stuck on a spoon They were part sun, part earth, part daughter, part son The origin of love
Now the gods grew quite scared Of our strength and defiance And Thor said "I'm gonna kill them all with my hammer Like I killed the giants" But the Zeus said "No You better let me use my lightning like scissors Like I cut the legs off the whales Dinosaurs into lizards" Then he grabbed up some bolts And he let out a laugh Said "I'll split them right down the middle Gonna cut them right up in half" And the storm clouds gathered above Into great balls of fire.
And then fire shot down from the sky in bolts Like shining blades of a knife And it ripped right through the flesh Of the children of the sun and the moon And the earth And some Indian god sewed the wound up Into a hole Pulled it 'round to our bellies To remind us the price we pay And Osiris and the gods of the nile Gathered up a big storm To blow a hurricane To scatter us away in a flood of wind and rain And a sea of tidal waves To wash us all away And if we don't behave They'll cut us down again We'll be hopping around on one foot And looking through one eye
Last time I saw you We just split in two You was looking at me I was looking at you You had a way so familiar But I could not recognize 'cause you had blood in your face And I had blood in my eyes But I could swear by your expression That the pain down in your soul Was the same as the one down in mine That's the pain That cuts a straight line down through the heart We call it love We wrapped our arms around each other Trying to shove ourselves back together We were making love Making love It was a cold dark evening such a long time ago When by the mighty hand of Jove It was a sad story how we became Lonely two-legged creatures It's the story The origin of love That's the origin of love.
Kindness is more important than wisdom, and the recognition of this is the beginning of wisdom.
Theodore Rubin
On Wisdom
Listen to the Exhortation of the Dawn! Look to this Day! For it is Life, the very Life of Life. In its brief course lie all the Verities and Realities of your Existence. The Bliss of Growth, The Glory of Action, The Splendor of Beauty; For Yesterday is but a Dream, And Tomorrow is only a Vision; But Today well lived makes Every Yesterday a Dream of Happiness, And every Tomorrow a Vision of Hope. Look well therefore to this Day! Such is the Salutation of the Dawn!
Narrador, orador, comunicador y deportista en potencia. Cuentacuentos, daydreamer y smiley guy consumado. Super handsome desde chiquito... y kinda mysterious;)